Every Man's Dream
by Dmitri Skomorochov
I know a man who had a dream, a dream of many men, it seems,
A dream of having women by his side,
He also dreamed to go to war, to fight a thousand men or more,
And cause all those of craven heart to hide,
And one year both these dreams came true, a lucky bastard, that is true,
He had his women and his war at last,
He planned to go into the world, with weapons, armour, and his girls,
And prove to every man he was the best,
The time came for the trip to start, the joy of which near burst his heart,
He'd finally had all that he'd ever need,
A golden helmet on his head, three women with to share his bed,
And two imported cases full of mead,
But Fate, she laughs at men who plan, and foils any way she can,
The best laid thoughts that enter in our minds,
No matter how hard he would try, on Fate you always could rely,
She'd find a way to ruin his good time,
Things went wrong right from the go, some trouble with a little snow,
But nothing that a hero couldn't bear,
The cold that entered to his head, and sent him coughing to his bed,
Had more effect at chilling his affair,
And suddenly without a cause, the women had, with not a pause,
Begun a war between their little team,
But the man laid low by winter chill, was worn out and most deathly ill,
He slept while all the women fought and screamed,
The make the matter so much worse, and add on insult to his curse,
The war had ended on the day he woke,
He missed the chance for war and peace, had even missing the evening's feast,
And all the warriors started heading home,
The crates of mead were left untouched, as were the women pretty much,
And word of this affair was never seen,
The party went their separate ways, and haven't tried unto this day,
To copy what was called "Every Man's Dream".